A Bra and Thong? No I'm Wearing Sexy Helsing Underwear

Hi Its Summer and you can tell by the warmer rain  ………….so ……….all good vampire girls take a look inside the wardrobes to see what can look good when the weather gets better for an innocent (cough, cough ) walk in the night air.…………so having a look at my bullet proof vest ……or should I use the correct term Body armour………...yes of course I have one !!!!! …….silly!...............a girl has got to be prepared hasn’t she………….

No it is not like the big things you see on TV that say CNN along with the words Press on them in large letter just so people from Fox News know who to shoot at……(a joke before they sue me) …. When they say they fight for the stories it is True!!

The press ones look so thick they could stop a tank shell and makes the reporter look fat ……..they come in media camouflage colours which means Black with large letters in white saying TV ………..PRESS ……………..  So if a rival new company does not get you then it will be the government troops or rebel forces that will. 

Mine is unisex and I got it before I found out about wearing sexy Helsing underwear ………….. er……….. Want to know about my underwear?  ……….hhehehehehe    …………. Then you should have read my book! …..some of it is illustrated ….heheheehehe

It is unisex and white and fits under the clothes ……….. White …..ok so its brilliant white… my idea is that you can take it off and wave it to surrender ………but no they say it is to make it not noticeable ! …..

…...NOT NOTICEABLE !!!!  well if you were wearing an overcoat then maybe ……….. but it is big thick and flattens ones boobs, not hard to do in my case but still, so extremely flattening but not in a nice way   ………….. It is held on with Velcro’s straps and buckles, the inner layer is breathable with lots of holes to stop one sweating in it………….

Sorry my Aunt always says girls do not sweat ………….. Horses sweat ………Men perspire and Women glow……………. So when I try it on in the summer I am glowing like a Horse………….. er………………the armour plating comes out via zip pockets and you can wash the jacket on a low setting if it gets too smelly.

And just because it says Designed for Comfort on it does not mean it is ……and besides if I wanted something designed for comfort it would be a bra and not body armour!……to put it on it goes over the head and the straps tie it together …………….ok  ok .so once it is on its ok…………. It’s just that I no longer look like a girl …if I was a little flat before…..I am now very FLAT …far flatter than any sports bra and without the advantage of looking like you are at least trying to get fit.

FBI agents may be able to put a jacket over it but I suggest a jumper that way you can try and put a tissue stuffed bra over it to give you back some sort of famine shape………….. er………. it is heavy ……… the weight is taken by the shoulders but it is still heavy .

I am told it is good against knife attacks and can take up to a 9mm bullet………. Huh as it I’m going to test it out by standing anywhere some is shooting at me ! …………… it may not be comfy but heck you try sticking a stake in me and you will soon discover that this girl is one smart cookie ………………

Humans are so stupid at times ………look we have seen all the horror films just like you have …………..and we know about how you want to kill us …………..

Hell he will have one silly look on his face after trying to stake me! …………..

er………well not for long as the mention of stake always makes me hungry…………..and ho just look I have now found my evening meal standing in front of me with a blunt stake and a silly look!

…………………. Human = Stupid ………………..

Want to see Panties with bite?
then look at this:.

http://www.myspace.com/avelinademoray/photos/19712545#%7B"ImageId":19712545%7D

Bad Ass Body Armor

Liquid Bullet-Proof Armour

Ultraviolet Trailer

Come take your Clothes off Amy Mah is having an Event

Hi all

I'm having a face book event !!!!!!    click here Face Book Event

Sorry I am keeping my clothes on but it still will be fun ........and .......well you can always take yours off.............. er.............if you dont mind the laughter from the other visitors.......... hehehehehe

Had a nice book review on youtube .............. take a look

So slowly people are discovering my little book of life as a teenage vampire.

If you have a blog and would also like to review my book please contact me at amymahvampire@aol.com

Want to know more? and see lots of manga art on my book? then  please click here FANGS RULE

Amy Mah (Vampire)

Sex on an Aircraft

We all remember the adds about the wonder bra ……………. When I first saw one it ran away and hid under the counter knowing that with my assets it would have to work far too hard to make any difference………….. But has anyone seen this?

It is called a     ……….. Miracle body-shaper ………and it promises perfect hour-glass figure

Does your tummy look more Christmas pud than pancake flat? You could always invest in Ultimo's latest body-shaping underwear, which claims to increase your chest by two cup sizes - and slim down the waist and stomach.

Described as the world's most advanced underwear.

The V-shape body also features a thong bottom to avoid visible lines and perspex straps for wearing under revealing party dresses.

Has anyone tried one?.............  up two cup sizes? ………. So I can at long last move up from preteen tops and trainer bras!................ok…….. ok ….an exaggeration ………...but over developed I am not ……………. ……..

Well the button thong is a good idea I have worn things that have put me on a waterless diet for fear of ever succeeding in getting a fashionably item off in time before I find out if it is waterproof or not ………….. some washrooms have such tiny cubicles that for the nose you are making getting everything off in a hurry..well ………. it sounds like you are practicing for the mile high club,,,…………..  Mile high club? ……….. Er ……..that’s means having sex on an aircraft over 1 mile high and in the tiny washroom cubicle it can not be fun ………….No I Have Not………Or Plan to!   Before you ask!!!  Just what would happen if you got pregnant?   My maid Bambi was conceived while her parents watched (er….didn’t watch) the Disney film of the same name. Just what would you name the child?  PanAir 747 economy class?  Just think how they would suffer at school.   

Click here........>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> http://www.fangsrule.com/buy.htm

Pruning your personal rainforest (trying to control pubic hair)

Ok Ok it is winter I should not have to worry about it! 

This is the time of year when a girl can grow her very own fur coat to keep warm and no one notices ………….

(If u have not guessed, I am talking about pruning one's own personal rainforest…………er …………..  a girl's garden  …………….If u don’t understand ……….well just go play with your stuffed bats until you are older….ok)

and ....well…………………it would have been fine if a friend had not invited me to go swimming then …….hmg…………..I noticed just how wild it had gone ………….. I mean there is slightly in need of a trim and there is the stage where people stare at u when u change! ………I mean it took so long in trying to tuck the straggles away that people thought I was playing with myself………..  then it looked like I had stuffed a sock in the bottom bit of the swimming costume ………so this must be why men don’t bother removing their undergrowth………….. and……… well some Guys really do need the help of stuffing a sock in their swimming shorts when there is cold water to swim in……………… er ……… yes Guys we do notice …….hehehehe

I am a living breathing vampire a full blood alpha female, and I feel sorry for my vampire maid BAMBI, being turned ……..UNDEAD ……….. the type of female vampire human males dream of having sex with, as they never age and always look like they did the day they died ……………. Er ……… Guys I think that is called Necrophilia …………. Look it up you perverts!.............    

Bambi died and got turned way back in the dark ages …..during the 1970s I think ……….. like most of the undead vampire girls she does not bother with panties …or in fact any underwear……… She believes the propaganda that Hollywood puts out .silly girl………. Yes no underwear …..Er..well no bodily functions so why bother.....and so she would look supper sexy all the time ……….. if she had only been prepared to be turned…………. She was not as you can see from her hair style.....see my website.......www.fangsrule.com   ………….. being Undead your body is fixed at the moment you are turned, so you have the same hairstyle no mater what the fashion is and I must have told you of the number of times I have seen maids take a knife and cut off all their hair only to have it grow back at the first taste of blood.

So vampires from her time have wonderful examples of undergrowth, I have noticed that some of the more fashionable ones do them as Afros or as a pony tail and the more adventurous ones attach coloured beads……….you may ask how I know this ……..er…well they all like wearing very short shirts and ………..well you can't help but notice ………...especially when the beads are in day glow orange and green!

No point in them attempting to have ……... A landing strip……. Er …….. Mahican and they can only dream of a Hollywood or Brazilian.

Where as I am a living vampire and so could do all that if I wanted to.....but er….No……… just because it is fashionable nowadays to be on all fours …like a dog………while some stranger pours hot wax on you………….. Yes HOT WAX!!!! And …….yes that is near ….er..very near  the most sensitive parts of the body!!! look we are vampires ….not ……..perverted masochists !

Well if my boyfriend wants me to go through that kind of humiliation he can darn well go first show me the results and then perhaps I may think about it!....but only think about it!

Bikini line…crap why not make the bikinis bigger! ………….. look if you just left it to grow………. you could go to the beach without a bikini bottom and with your natural wild female rainforest ……….. well it will normally cover a larger area than any of the micro bikini’s that look more like a colored piece or cord between your legs ………….. and as to covering anything........ well…………. What do you think dental floss can hide ………when we are talking about girl’s bits and private places.  

You can even get a tattoo to help with your body topiary art  ………..this is a real tattoo! ……….no it is not mine!   

MY book FANG RULE a girls guide to being a vampire should be out in march see more of me at http://www.fangsrule.com/amy.htm  

Butt Cleavage Panties

Butt Cleavage Panties


Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh look at what I found in the section on panties for christmas fun:

We’ve been alerted to an odd new trend that frankly, I wouldn’t have even thought of if TrendHunter hadn’t pointed it out. It’s about butt cleavage, and we’re not talking about that peek of posterior you get after gaining a pound or two and pulling on those low-rise jeans. No, this is butt cleavage of a very purposeful sort.

Come on girls this is what your boyfriend will now get you for christmas ............. LOL

Click here:......... >>>>>>>>>>>>>> http://www.fangsrule.com/buy.htm