Last night, went over to Marc's place. Told myself to get home by 3am but in the end, ended up staying over for the night. Drink & got drunk. Okay whatever. Woke up arnd 12pm+ & went home arnd 3pm+. Came home, & slept. I don't know why, but I'm feeling really upset right now. I'm sorry Mom, I shldn't have done things to make you upset, I'm really sorry ): I feel so fucking sick now, I feel like puking & headaches >:( Supposed to go out with Girlfriend today, but didn't in the end. Haiz.
Baby, I hope one day you'll realise how much I sacrifice for you. I do everything just to see you smile. I hope you really do love me too. Finding out things you did behind my back is just unbearable. I still can't trust you. What if you'll cheat on me like last time? I mean if you do, then why do you want me so bad? Darling, you cannot have best of both worlds. & you clearly know, what's mine is mine. I DO NOT LIKE TO SHARE. Well, I'm glad you have come to an agreement with me that if I were to find out that you'd done things behind my back, it's over between us.
You know sometimes you knew too much about a certain something that you wish you had never knew. The truth is always my greatest fear in a relationship cause men cheat (I don't say women don't). Through it all, I'm gonna pull through. Cause baby this love is worth fighting for. & even at times I really wish to give up, break down & cry, I'm still gonna go on. I love you Marc, for love explains it all.
The saddest thing in this world is standing in front of a man you love so much & wishing you could spend eternity with him, but also knowing he does not feel the same way about you, knowing it's no longer going to be the same in the future..
..everything just smitten.
Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man. Love to forgive him; & patience for his moods. Because Lord, if I pray for Strength, I know I won't be able to be brave still.
I want to be that girl you'd run up to & tell your friends "that's her".
I try to come closer with you
But they all say we won't make it through
